Spam Poetry, Philosophical Version

My current batch of spam comments, when not in Asian print characters, has gone from admonishing me to philosophical cultural commentary.

“Perhaps I’ve been looking at too many fashion magazines. There are a lot of them, proliferating in somewhat the way fashion itself has, as a decentralized system constantly mutating, replicating and deconstructing itself as the globe grows ever smaller. Increasingly, fashion has come to seem influenced not so much by monolithic and oracular editorial posses as by renegades, outsiders with few historical ties to the trade.”

Interesting thesis, give me a twelve page proposal on it by Monday. What? It could be true. I don’t know, I don’t read fashion magazines. What I do know is that A) 90 percent of fashion for stores is designed for fifteen-year-old underweight straight-figured girls, and B) fashion currently is frantically recycling styles from the 1970’s, 80’s, and early 1990’s, which I suspect is not very outlawy.

“’Whether an abduction occurred or not remains to be seen, and out of respect for those close to the ski, I’m not going to speculate on that at this time,’” Sheriff DiSalvo told reporters, adding that every second the ski remained missing its owner was losing valuable time on the slopes. “’Obviously, the pain of knowing one’s ski is out there somewhere, very possibly in harm’s way, is a lot to bear. I just can’t imagine if it were my own ski.’”

This is quite funny satire and fairly coherent, so I’m guessing they cribbed it from something. How this is supposed to sell me anything other than skis, I’m not sure. Perhaps it was penned by a renegade outsider with few historical ties to the trade.

“Fit a period restricted in songs. Similar to a patent is basically a fixed monopoly whereby typically the obvious support is actually awarded the particular unique to certainly make, work with, market the actual branded innovation for any confined time period. Once the name associated with defense has finished, typically the branded development goes in anyone area. Songs is no distinct after that an individual inventing anything.”

Sounds pretty, but doesn’t scan. I think they are making an argument for plagiarism of music and limitation of copyright. Why are they doing such a thing? They’re renegade outlaws! Don’t question it!